Tuesday, October 4, 2011

Oh, Brothers!

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We have an interesting phenomenon happening in our house recently.  First, we have Ayden who is pretty much completely non-verbal.  Second, we have Issac who at 2.5 never ever stops talking is now speaking in full sentences. 

I don't talk about Issac much on here, and mostly that is because he's developing at what is considered the "normal" rate for children.  It's certainly not that he's less important, but I try to focus on what it's like living with Fragile X in our lives.  I'm sure the older he gets, Issac will become more a part of everything as I know he is going to have his own unique experience with FX.  But, I digress.

The phenomenon I referred to above deals directly with Issac.  He loves his brother dearly.  He wants Ayden to do the same things as him and be in the same room with him most all of the time.  Sure they fight, but they are brothers and that is very much expected.  As we've progressed with Issac through saying words to speaking in sentences just recently, we've noticed Ayden started to say some of the words Issac would say or do things Issac would do.  It is a great thing to see, though a bit backwards for the younger one to be teaching the older of course.  It has been just recent though that Issac has now started doing  a few things.

First, he has begun to order Ayden around.  It will happen after mom or dad tells Ayden to do something where Issac will repeat what we say.  "A-A-Bay go get shoes!"  We are slowly correcting this behavior, but it is a weird thing for me to see happening.  Second, Issac will just decide Ayden needs or wants something that he himself wants as well and be very adamant about it.  "A-A-Bay want cereal too!"  Finally, he will just do things for Ayden if he is having a difficult time doing them (or pretending he can't).

This last thing is what is bothering me the most.  We try to make Ayden as independent as possible but he fights us on it tooth and nail.  For the most part, he would just rather have someone else do it for him.  It's a huge problem, especially as he will pretend he doesn't know how to do something and be extra cute asking for help (lots of kisses, hugs etc).  Plus, it's getting worse!  It is taking a lot of constant communication with anyone that is around Ayden to be sure they are making him do things on his own....but even his own brother will help him out!

So, we're working slowly towards a solution.  Working with Issac is important as well as working with Ayden to find the proper motivation to WANT to do these things for himself.  We haven't seen much progress yet, but it will come.  More than likely Issac will learn more quickly than Ayden...but we'll get there either way.  In the meantime, any advice would be welcome.  :)


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